self compassion

The Self Compassion of Honoring What You Need

The Self Compassion of Honoring What You Need

When we think about self-compassion, it is often associated with the ideas of being kind to oneself and letting go of our inner critic.  These are unquestionably important elements, but not really related to the insight I recently had. 

The form of self-compassion that I’m thinking about is when we listen to our hearts and honor what we need, even if this is different from what we think we want.

Teacher Self-Care: Saying Yes to Saying No

Teacher Self-Care:  Saying Yes to Saying No

Self-care is what keeps us feeling good, both mentally and physically.  When you feel both physically healthy and mentally strong, you are able function at a level that wouldn’t be possible otherwise.   I’ve written before about why self-care and self-advocacy are not selfish.  It allows you to effectively and resiliently support all the people in your life who are counting on you. 

How, then, do we introduce more self-advocacy and self-care into our busy everyday lives when we’re so often focused on everyone else?

Learn to Stop Beating Yourself Up

Learn to Stop Beating Yourself Up

“It’s time to stop beating yourself up.” 

When I speak to groups of students or educators, I make sure to touch on self-compassion as an important part of mindfulness practice.  Typically, I begin with the statement above, shortly followed by, “…it’s not working, nor is it doing what you think it is.” 

I start my overview of self-compassion with this because the experience of mentally beating oneself up is rather universal in our culture.  Just about everyone does it, and I would guess that you do, too.  

Negative self-talk and the inner critic are so pervasive because many people see it as useful.  Some people even resist being gentler with themselves because they think self-flagellation is how they “hold themselves accountable” or “stay in line” or “teach themselves a lesson” when they mess up.